I posted my demand nearly a minute ago and nobody has answered yet. What’s taking so long?
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Cutting the deck is when you take half the deck and put it under the other half. Whole cards are cards that have not been cut. The flip is when the last card changes the weakest hands to the strongest flipping everyone off. The turn - well poker is a turnbased game so people take turns. The river is when you get a lot of good cards in a row and the chips flow in.
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Tournament points and leaderboards
I just had a valuable lesson from my friend Foldan Bingov on how to collect tourney points and top leaderboards all the time. She shared her secret with me and I’m sharing it with the rest of the world so that everyone can benefit from her wisdom.
She says that, in order to top leaderboards and collect as many points as possible, there are 3 key points.
1- Always fold: there is no need to play every hand, or any hand for that matter. If your goal is to make it to the final table, just fold as much as you can. Don’t play, don’t engage, just fold. Fold 95% of the time. Fold even if you’re in the SB or BB positions. Always fold preflop. Don’t play. Playing poker is for losers. Folding is for winners.
2- Wait for aces or kings, and go all in. That’s right. Keep folding until you get those aces. The second you see them, go all in preflop. Whether someone calls or everyone folds, it doesn’t matter. Just go all in. If you win the pot, that’s more chips for you to keep folding, waiting for those aces to come again.
3- Always show your cards when you win the hand. Of course you will win very few hands because you’re only playing very few hands. But you have to ALWAYS show your cards when you win. You go all in preflop, everyone folds, it doesn’t matter, show them your hole cards. Just show everyone what you’re doing and what you have. Be proud.
When I asked her what about betting, raising, calling, bluffing, etc… Foldan Bingov replied: to hell with poker, who cares? We’re not here to learn how to play poker, or to enjoy a good game of poker. We are here to collect points and top leaderboards. That’s the way: fold, fold, fold, fold fold, fold, all in, repeat…
So to all of you who keep complaining when they see Foldan at the table, saying how much you hate her because she ruins the game with her folding bingo style, please think again. Foldan only wants to win. If you want to play poker, she doesn’t. Please understand her 
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try that at A C you’ll be playing slots shortly!
I think she wants to play, but doesn’t know how.
It’s a scientifically proven fact that anyone who approaches the game even slightly differently than I do is a big fish donkey. Obviously, I play optimally, and anyone who doesn’t is trying to ruin the game for everyone. We all agree on this, at least statistically.
The only way these sub-optimal fish ever win a pot is that the site is rigged!
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It’s also a scientifically proven fact that because one person in one video about one tourney this one time did it, it’s absolutely a valid strategy. There’s a video to prove it and that’s all the prove we need
When we go fishing, I don’t expect everyone to fish like me. I use a fishing rod and put the bait on the hook, another one uses a fishing net. Our less caring friends use dynamite, and our more conservative friends use a spear or even dive and grab the fish with their mouth. However, there is this one guy who comes with us, grabs the bait and throws it in the water as it is. Using bait is one part of the fishing experience, so it’s absolutely a valid fishing strategy, because he used it. It’s on video too. Lost of fish came, ate the bate, and left. So it’s a valid strategy.
I went bowling with friends. Nobody was expected to play exactly like me, but we were all expected to play the same game. I held the ball with both hands and took 2 steps before releasing it. My friends did it differently. Some threw it with just one hand, others took 1 step, etc… But there was this one friend who held the ball with 1 hand, did 3 turns, then threw it at the people behind us instead of aiming at the pins. We have to admit it’s a valid strategy, because holding the ball is one aspect of the game.
Choosing one move from any game and doing it all the time is absolutely a valid strategy. Same for poker. If one decides to go all in all the time, or fold all the time, or make a house of cards with the deck all the time, that’s absolutely a valid strategy. They don’t have to think, to learn, to play, or even to look at the cards. As long as they’re using cards, it’s a valid strategy
It’s just different to the way I play. It’s not even the same game I’m playing. but they’re playing, so it’s valid. 
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I don’t really believe you go bowling.
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I just took up fishing. I am doing it in my bathtub, seems a lot easier than actually going out side. No fish yet, but caught a bar of soap, a washrag and a rubber duck 
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Some tips for increasing that bankroll of yours 
Do you know in your heart of hearts that you are a good winning poker player? But you just stumble into bad beat after cooler after bad beat? Me too. We’ve all been in this boat.
Here I’ve compiled my best poker strategies so you can start winning quickly and get a bankroll corresponding to your True Skill.
The first thing you should do is to go to your bank page and click the reload button. 2500 free chips! Neat. Next make sure you login everyday to catapult your bankroll with 2500 new shiny chips per day. Another little ace in my pocket is inviting friends. You see first you get 10k chips just like that. But then you can beat them and take their chips too before they learn whether J or pair is better. Just coach them into headsup for an easy win. Finally I would recommend using your credit card to give yourself a little starting boost. Like you could either spend a few dollars or you could grind for days to get to the same place. You’re a busy professional. Your time is worth more than minimum wage so just punch those digits in. 
The cool thing about this is that you will be taken from those tricky low stakes tables to higher stake ones. People wont call your bluffs down anymore. They’ll see your rank and start Respecting Your Raises. This is a very powerful concept that you can leverage into building yourself a bigger bankroll. It’s like a snowball. The higher rank the more respect the faster you can build your bankroll and get even higher rank.
So what are you waiting for? Turbocharge your earnings now!
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LOL! If you work for Replay, you have to tell us, right?
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I just thought of something interesting that I decided to post on the forums. I’m not looking for anyone to agree or disagree, or reply or comment, I just want to post it here for no reason, on public forums made for discussions and debates, but it’s not for discussion or debate.
I noticed that if you took the number of hands you played and added it to the number of chips you lost, and divided the total by the sum of your phone number and your social security number, you get a number. It’s a useless number, but it’s a number nonetheless, and it’s interesting to me.
It’s probably useful, but also not useful. Anyway, you should do it.
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Probably one of the best songs about coco and jumbo…
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There’s another one?! 
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Probably.
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I just had a valuable lesson from my friend Cryaya Skilly on how to complain about other players that are better than her. She shared her secret with me and I’m sharing it with the rest of the world so that everyone can benefit from her wisdom.
- Always write to the forums long crying notes, instead of using that time for practicing….
- Have a right to say anything to other players, and then complain when they reply
- When she wins its always skill, but when she loses its always luck and bingo
Thanks again to Cryaya Skilly for the advices…
P.S. Everybody should play by her rules…
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Get a room! 
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