What Type of Poker Fish Are You?

After the first shock, most of us have accepted with resignation the harsh verdict: you Replay players are all fishes, except six of us! Then we started wondering, very well, but what type of fish are we all? So Maya and I have asked a German/Israeli/Italian group of scientists to compile a test to find it out.
The test is based on serious behavioral, neurobiological, psychological, genetic, pharmacological and philosophical researches.
Serious? Hmm… maybe not that serious, let’s say semi-serious :slight_smile:
Take the test and share with us what type of fish you are. For the results, please click on “Results”.

1- Which statement fits best to your poker playing style?

A I have no particular strategy, I always count on my luck
B I play a classic, solid poker and let the fishes commit mistakes
C I attentively study the other fishes in order to outplay them
D I always want to crash all other fishes, and I usually succeed

2- Is a mathematical understanding of poker important to you?

A I don’t need no bloody math. I follow my instinct and experience
B You do not really need that. Later on, you will have a feeling for the right odds
C It is a part of it. It is more important to read your opponents, though
D Very important. You have to be aware of the probabilities

3- Please mention the most important reason for you to play poker

A It is a way to spend my leisure time in company of funny fishes who enjoy cards games
B I like to win money or chips. It improves either my bank account or my self-confidence
C I like the theoretical requirements and depth of the game
D I love to fight with other fishes, always and everywhere

4- When asked for help by someone you care about:

A You go out of your way and make sacrifices to help
B You help as long as it doesn’t get in the way of any of your plans
D You help only if the person has helped you in the past or can help you in the future
C You hate doing favors and helping altogether

5- Does poker dominate your life?

A No, I only play occasionally and rather as a social event
B I spend a large part of my leisure time playing poker or studying new strategies, but I don’t take it too seriously
C I often play poker, but once in a while I have other things to think of, pleasant like a date, or bothering like work
D I am a maniac. Either I play poker, or I think every minute of it, except when I sleep. And when I sleep, I dream of it

6- On a scale of 1-10 how skilled you think you are in poker?

A 1-3
B 4-6
C 7-9
D 10 I am the best!

7- When you go to a restaurant in company of others (ladies or gentlemen):

A You always insists on paying the bill for all
B You prefer the bill to be shared equally among all people
C You disappear in the loo for half an hour, hoping the others will have payed the bill till your return
D You only go to a restaurant when you are invited!

8- What phobia would fit you best?

A Selachophobia (fear of sharks)
B Harpaxophobia (fear of being robbed)
C Hippophobia (fear of horses or other hoofed animals like donkeys)
D Gnosophobia (fear of knowledge)

9- Do you:

A Work better as part of a team
B Work better alone
C Both alone and as part of a team
D Hate to work either way

10- You are minding your own business when suddenly an urge strikes you to go shopping. Where do you shop?

A You shop for clothing and shoes. The fun is in trying everything out before buying
B You shop online. You don’t like the crowds and the waiting in line
C Fish-Mart (The general store for fish)
D- Whats the point of shopping? Everything ends in sadness

11- You go exploring in an underwater cave and find a treasure chest with shiny baubles and gold doubloons. What do you do with it?

A Keep the majority, but give some to family and friends
B Spend it all
C Donate it to the FWCS Association (Fish Who Can’t Swim)
D You hate shiny. Shiny is happiness, and you are not

12- What is your favorite starting hand in poker?

A It varies
B AK
C KK
D AA

Results

A = 1 point
B = 2 points
C = 3 points
D = 4 points
Add all your answers up and check which type of fish you are according to the total points:

12 to 17 points: You’re a typical Sardine. Sorry for you. Your opponents will see at first sight you are used to being squeezed in a box, and will jump on you. Either you’ll learn to get out of your self-imposed psychological limits, or everybody will snap from you even the last particle of plankton!

18 to 23 points: You’re a Clown fish. As all clown fishes you are a funny and visionary problem solvers and are often able to contrive a solution even in the direst straights. Naturally creative, you strive to be the most eccentric fish of the sea, and own your own style. You are often a risk-taker who prefer original moves rather than playing by the rules. With unexpected high bets and all-ins you often enervate more experienced fishes.

24 to 29 points: You’re a Flying fish. At the poker table, you are the master of adaptability and variability! You swim like a fish and fly like a bird! You are tight during a drought – you can fold 20 times in a row – but then, et voilà, you spread your wings and fly high into the sky taking all by surprise with an expected move which make all the others swear at you.

30 to 35 points: You’re an Eel. Like all eels you don’t fear arduous journeys through positive and negative times. You suffer, you fight, you fail, you stand up again, and then the same odyssey from the beginning. Your steadiness and stubbornness are your best weapons against all other fishes, and especially sharks! They will try to crash you, but you’ll always contrive to slide away. You are an eel, after all. Where is the problem?

36 to 41 points: You’re a Swordfish. The swordfish is a fighter, a predator, and comes equipped with its own deadly weapon. It’s feared among fish, but it’s in no way the strongest. Unless you’re a shark, you should beware of the swordfish, for you won’t last long against its sword. Sometimes they feel threatened by the sharks and mostly engage with them in some epic fights, killing each other and making the day of all other fishes.

42 to 48 points: You’re a Shark. Needless to say, the shark is the top of the chain, the most feared predator of all. No matter what type of fish you are, you won’t stand a chance against its teeth. When it bets, fold. When it calls, stop betting. Only come out and play when it folds, but beware, for it only folds to give you a false sense of security before it strikes again.

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IMG_0912

27 points

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I’m another Flying Fish, but… I split my answers to three questions (1, 3, + 5) between two choices and took the average. Had I taken only the top choices, I’d have been an eel, only the lower choices, still a FF.
There are some really serious questions hiding in this group. You did good.
Have you ever thought of writing those daily horoscope outlooks for newspapers? I’ll bet you’d be good at it, and certainly fun to read.

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I’m a flying fish too. 26 points.
Is the majority of players here gonna be flying fish? :joy:
We need more data to analyse…

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I scored SOLIDLY in the Clown catagory. I really think I’m a little closer to sub-average as a poker player, but as a fish, I can barely swim! :rofl:
My score would have been a GREAT report card in high school though.

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Clown fishes rule! :slight_smile:

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I so hoped to be “biggest fish”, but alas, I’m only a clown fish, too! And this test doesn’t lie. :frowning:

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Alan, a friend of mine wrote the horoscope for a German newspaper. Every morning she came into the office and said: “Morning guys, and what do you want to read today?” Some tried to bribe her with cappuccini and donuts, especially if they had a date. :slight_smile:

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wasn’t sure about several questions but apperently i’m an eel :slight_smile:

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Nothing new here. Clown Fish.

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1 question has two answers for me and so it is 23.5 Points. Must be a flying clown. :wink:

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Guess I am an eel lol!

I like to win but being the “best” or top player has it’s downside. Go bragging and showing a big stack and you put a big target on your back and someone will come along and knock you off your mountain every time.

I prefer the middle of the pack and let my skills do the talking and getting respect for your skills is more important than the size of your stack IMO.

Good quiz and thanks!

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Where are the Sharks and the Swordfishes??? :thinking:

I reckon I’m a flying fish (26)…thanks Miri for gathering the German/Israeli/Italian group of scientists to develop this test. :slightly_smiling_face:

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They don’t need any test to know they are the best fishes of ponds and seas! :slight_smile:

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Flying fish, right there in the middle.

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I got clown fish. Between this result and getting banana in the fruit quiz, I’m beginning to feel like a terrible comedy act. :joy:

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:joy::joy::joy:
I’m a flying fish who is also an orange. I think I’m heading more towards fantasy and sci-fi lol

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24 points for me, making me a flying fish. :thinking:

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26 = Flying Fish :slight_smile: Encouraging. My education will continue!

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