Speaking of poker hand nicknames, here’s a list of poker hand nicknames used to describe the most popular starting hands in poker, as well as poker hand rankings.
Pairs
AA – Rockets, Pocket Rockets, Bullets, American Airlines, Sticks, Snake Eyes, Flying Nazis, Teepees, Alan Alda, Joe Louis (As-Ac), Visine (Ah-Ad), Sharp Tops
KK – Cowboys, King Kong, Gorillas, Kangaroos, Krispy Kreme, Ace Magnets
QQ – Ladies, Hilton Sisters, Canadian Rockets, Canadian Aces, Siegfried & Roy, Double date, Jailhouse Rock, Snowshoes, Divas, Calamity Jane
JJ – Fishhooks, hooks, Johnnies, Jay Birds, Kid Dynamite, Gents, Dyne-O-Mite (JJ from Good Times)
TT – Dimes, Tension
99 – German Virgin (“nine nine” nine sounds like the German word for “no”), Barbara Felton (Get Smart Agent 99), Gretzky, Popeye’s
88 – Snowmen, Dog Balls, Octopuses, Piano Keys, Racetracks, Double Infinities, Wurlitzer, Two Fat Ladies, Little Oldsmobile
77 – Walking Sticks, Hockey Sticks, Sunset Strip, Mullets, Saturn
66 – Route 66, Cherries, Kicks
55 – Presto, Speed Limit, Nickels
44 – Magnum, Sailboats, Canadian Presto, Dirty Harry, Sailboats, Midlife Crisis, Darth Vader (black fours)
33 – Crabs, Treys, Strumpor Och Skor (Socks and Shoes)
22 – Ducks, Deuces, Pocket Swans, Quack Quack
Aces
AK – Big Slick, Big Slick in a Suit (suited), Santa Barbara, Anna Kournikova (good looking but rarely wins), Salt Lake Pair
AQ – Big Chick, Little Slick, Walking Back to Houston
AJ – Jack Ass, Blackjack, Ajax, Apple Jacks
A9 – Chris Ferguson
A8 – Dead Man
A5 – High Five
A4 – Plane Crash, Transvestite (you see the first ace, and the 4 looks like another, but it turns out not to be)
A3 – Ashtray, Baskin Robbins (31 flavors)
A2 – Little Slick, Acey-Deucy, Hunting Season (a bullet and a duck)
Other Starting Hand Nicknames
KQ – Royal Couple, Marriage (suited), Divorce (suited), Mixed Marriage (offsuit), Othello (offsuit), Lucy and Ricky
KJ – Kojak, King John, Harry Potter (J.K. Rowling), Bill Fillmaff (offsuit), Bachelor (offsuit), Tucson Monster, Just Kidding
KT – Katie, Big Al, Wood Cutter
K9 – Canine, Dog, Bow wow, Fido, Saw Mill, What a Dog, Pedigree (suited), Mutt (offsuit), Mongrel
K8 – Feast (the king ate), Kokomo
K7 – Columbia River (famous for Salmon, K7 sounds like King Salmon)
K4 – Fork, Fork Off when offsuited.
K3 – King Crab, Commander Crab, Krablar, Sizler
K2 – Everest, “Big Fritz” when suited.
QJ – Oedipus Rex, Maverick “Livin’ on jacks and queens”
QT – Quint, Robert Varkonyi, Hot Babe or Hot Stud, Goolsby
Q9 – Quinine
Q7 – Computer Hand
Q6 – Peanut Butter and Jelly
Q5 – Granny Mae
Q3 – Gay Waiter, San Franscisco Busboy, Streetwalker, Windsor Waiter
JQ – Fred & Ethel
JT – One Time Thought to be the Best Drawing Hand (suited)
J9 – T.J. Cloutier
J8 – Jeffrey Dahmer (Jeffrey Dahmer ate Jack)
J6 – Jack Talley, Railroad Hand
J5 – Motown, Jackson Five
J4 – Flat Tire
T9 – Countdown
T8 – Golden Dan, Tetris
T7 – Bowling Hand, Split
T5 – Woolworth, Merfs, Dimestore
T4 – Roger That, Convoy, Good Buddy, Over and Out, Broderick Crawford
T3 – Weinberg
T2 – Doyle Brunson or Texas Dolly
98 – Oldsmobile
96 – Big Lick, Railroad, Dinner for Two, Happy Meal, Good Lover, Prom Night (suited)
95 – Dolly Parton, Hard Working Man
94 – San Francisco (49ers), Joe Montana Banana
93 – Jack Benny
92 – Twiggy, Montana Banana, Golf Bag
86 – Henry Bowen, Pacheco Nuts
85 – Finky Dink
84 – Big Brother, Orwell
83 – Sven, Most feared hand in Texas Hold’em.
78 – RPM
76 – Union Oil, Philadelphia (76ers), Trombones
75 – Filipino Slick
74 – Cambodian Big Slick
73 – Hachem
72 – Whip (Worst Hand In Poker), Beer Hand, The Hammer
69 – Joe Bernstein
65 – Ken Warren
64 – The Rabbit
63 – Blocky, Jimmy Summerfield (offsuit)
62 – Ainsworth, Cowboy Wolford
57 – Heinz, Pickle Man
53 – Bully Johnson
52 – Pick up (as in 52 card pick up), Quarter, Two Bits
45 – Jesse James, Jane Russell, Moneymaker
43 – Waltz
42 – Lumberman’s Hand
38 – Raquel Welch
32 – Mississippi Slick, Polish Big Slick, Hooter Hand (suited), Can of Corn
24 – Solid Gold, Jack Bauer
Other Hands
A, K, Q, J, T – Broadway
A, 2, 3, 4, 5 – Wheel (Steel Wheel if suited), Bicycle or Bike, Pup or Puppy
Q, Q, Q, 3, 3 – San Francisco Waiters (‘queens with treys’)
K, K, K, K – The Four Horsemen (of the Apocalypse)
Q, Q, Q, Q – Village People (‘four Queens’)
3, 3, 3, 3 – Forest (‘four trees’)
A, A, 8, 8 – Dean Man’s Hand
A, K, 4, 7 – Assault Rifle
K, K, 9, 9 – Pair of Dogs (two K-9’s)
J, J, 5, 5 – Rock and Roll (Jackson Five)
9, 9, 6, 6 – Dinner for Four
K, K, K – The Three Wise Men, The Alabama Night Riders, Ku Klux Klan
A, A, A – Beatles Reunion
Q, Q, Q – Six Tits
T, T, T – Thirty Miles of Bad Road
6, 6, 6 – The Devil, The Beast
5, 5, 5 – Washington Monument
4, 4, 4 – Grand Jury
2, 2, 2 – Huey, Dewey and Louie
A, 2, 3 – ABC (First 3 Cards)
A – Bull
K – Cowboy
Q – Lady, Dame
J – Hook, J-bird, J-boy
9d – Course of Scotland
3 – Trey
A Joker – Bug
All Blue or All Pink – Any Flush
Any face card – Paint, Liner
Arkansas Flush – A Four Flush
Case Card – Fourth Card of a Rank
Club Flush – Golf Bag
Four of a Kind – Quads
Four Pair (Omaha) – Noah’s Ark
Pair in First Two Cards – Wired Pair
Heart Flush – Valentines
King high Club flush – Rodney
Three of a Kind – Trips, Gleek
Three of a Kind with Pair in the Hole – Set
Three Pair – Shoe Store