On a hot sweltering day, in a Gulf state Statehouse the Representatives were arguing over what a proper dress code for female members. One had shown up in a dress without sleeves and was being admonished. This played out on the evening news, and my wife turned to me and said, “I think they forgot about the Second Amendment”.
Why does Orion’s belt only have three stars?
Well, some of the reviews say it’s just a waist of space.
Did you see that guy wearing camouflage?
Me neither.
Two criminals are taking a walk deep in the woods one dark night.
Boy, it sure is creepy out here, says the first outlaw.
How do you think I feel? asks his companion. I have to walk back alone.
They outlawed prostitution near prisons…
Because you shouldn’t end a sentence with a proposition.
My son said he wants to be an outlaw when he grows up
When I asked why, he said “dad you hate in-laws so much I figured I’d be the opposite!”
What has a bottom at the top?
Your legs
Where is the only place where today comes before yesterday?
The dictionary
Throw away the outside and cook the inside, then eat the outside and throw away the inside. What is it?
Corn on the cob.