Joke of the week

fish lost appetite

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I hired a handyman who said he could do some odd jobs.

He did every other thing on my list.

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This sounds like the donkbusta…right Bodie?

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@RavenL

too funny

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why an empty bottle of wine is better

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OK, but no jokes about circles.

They’re pointless.

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there are 10 types of people, those who understand the base-2 numerical system and those who don’t.

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:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

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Went shopping online for a new toaster,
and found a specialist site for it, but gave up.
Got too many pop ups.

One of the shortest wills ever written:
Being of sound mind, I spent all the money.

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I was washing the car with a friend, until they said, “Can’t you just use a sponge?”

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A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman and ordered a glass of champagne.
The woman perked up and said, “How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne, too!”
“What a coincidence,” the farmer said. “This is a special day for me; I am celebrating.”
“This is a special day for me too, I am also celebrating,” said the woman.
“What a coincidence!” said the farmer. As they clinked glasses, he added, “What are you celebrating?”
“My husband and I have been trying to have a child, and today my gynecologist told me that I am pregnant!”
“What a coincidence!” said the man. “I’m a chicken farmer, and for years all of my hens were infertile, but today they are all laying fertilized eggs.”
“That’s great!” said the woman, “How did your chickens become fertile?”
“I used a different rooster,” he replied.
The woman smiled, clinked his glass and said, “What a coincidence!”

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image

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One dog tells another, "Did you know 99.9% of dogs can’t do math?

Fortunately, I’m part of the 10% who can."

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whers is any key

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On a hot sweltering day, in a Gulf state Statehouse the Representatives were arguing over what a proper dress code for female members. One had shown up in a dress without sleeves and was being admonished. This played out on the evening news, and my wife turned to me and said, “I think they forgot about the Second Amendment”.

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