CONTEST - Write a poker poem

This month’s contest is a submission by @JuiceeLoot! Write your own poker poem.

Whether it rhymes or it doesn’t, whether it’s a sonnet or a haiku, it just needs to be poker themed to qualify for the contest. Anything will do! Get creative. (Just keep those limericks family-friendly!)

November is all about giving thanks, and we’re showing ours by giving out bonus prizes. That means that the authors of the THREE most popular entries will win Replay Poker knitted caps (or beanies) to keep their heads warm this winter!

That means that we again need your help. Click on the heart of any post that tickles your fancy. You may enter as many times as you like, but you can only win one beanie. That means if you have two of the highest votes, the person with the next highest amount will get one as well. (If there is a tie, as with the Epitaph contest, I’ll share the answers with staff and we’ll act as tiebreakers.)

Not only that, we’ll be awarding five random winners 100,000 chips just for participating!

Winners will be selected on Thursday, November 21st. Happy writing!

5 Likes

Here’s one to get you started:

I went to town to see
That old tattooed lady,
The one of many parts
They call the Queen of Hearts.

Upon her knee
The Diamond three.
Her ankle bore
A big spade four.

Upon her back
A straight to the Jack.
She held her wine
In a hand marked nine.

There were stacks of chips
Upon her hips.
On her fingers, rings
Of all four kings.

What I liked best
Was upon her chest
But I knew I’d never
Beat her large pair

Of Aces.

8 Likes

There was a old goat
That thought he was the most
until he met an old hag
who was decked out to the hilt (not in a kilt)
with gifts from the swag store.

1 Like

There once was a grinder from Newton, Who’s skills a few were disputin’, It could be their mistake, and their chips he might take, and more Phish-heads he will be recruitin’

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Poker was the game
That led her to fame
With all of that skill
She went for the kill
Betting and raising without any fear
Till she lost with rockets and got kicked in the rear .

7 Likes

being unwell with time on my hands
for a spell I can play a few hands
betting with suited runners
and a bingo player betting their stack
so I fold what looks a bit vulnerable
Cos I know I wouldn’t get my chips back

When the impatient players have finished their bingo
and some start to feel short stacked
some chancers try bluffing big on the river
cos if they check they won’t get their chips back

Some bet to the hilt
when they lose they go TILT with their stack
all in pre flop every hand they keep on rebuying
cos they keep desperately trying
to get the chips that they still won’t get back.

4 Likes

replay poker you can win!
replay poker i can win!
replay poker we all can win!
replay poker * we all are the greatest winner!

1 Like

I looked at my cards with little regard
The flop gave me the flush
Which made me blush
My cards were so hot
That I bet the pot
I watched each one fold
Except one who was bold
He raised my bet on the river
Which I called without even a quiver
I won that hand which he said was just luck
But he never showed his hand and hit muck
[rolls eyes]

5 Likes

Hearts and Diamond are Red, Spades and Clubs they are Black, All-in-Donkeys named Bingo get a virtual smack.

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I’m at the table
The clock is ticking
Almost time for poker picking
The cards are dealt
I got a flush
I bet it all
but in my rush
Someone has a house
And I take the fall
Maybe next time
I will only call …

4 Likes

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I love pudding
Let’s play poker

4 Likes

Got out of bed this morning it’s time for the game
I do this every day its always the same
I log into Replay and take my seat
Wonder what cards i will get and who i will meet
2 cards in my hand and the flop dropping down
The smile on my face soon turns into a frown
Next hand is dealt no Aces have i
It’s time to bluff or soon i will die
All of my chips go into the pot
I call all in and wait for my shot
Congratulations Sassee you have won
I take my chips that sure was fun
I call it a day can’t wait to come back
Hope i can win to build up my stack
Had so much fun i wish i could stay
Thank you Replay you sure made my day

16 Likes

In the old town of Auburn in the hills of gold
I’d find the Shanghai Restaurant so I was told.
With Liquor in the front and Poker in the back
it was just the place for this one-eyed Jack.
I purchased a bottle and walked toward the rear
to a dark smokey room with the smell of stale beer
As my eyes adjusted there could be seen
Six chairs and a table with a cloth of green.
I took a seat and showed my money
and the dealer said “What’s yer name sonny?”
I won’t be here long so that doesn’t matter
Just deal the cards and cut the chatter.
Well he dealt me three Cowboys and then two Jacks
I gave a low chuckle as I shoved all my stack.
I never left Auburn, but my widow’s here often
Making a payment on my headstone and coffin.

6 Likes

I love to play card games
but my favourite game is poker
you use all the cards in the deck
all except for the joker

I pit my wits against other players
from all around the world
any one can play the game
all ages man woman boy or girl

I’ve played on many sites
at all times of the day
but the best games and players
I’vel found them here on Replay

you’ll find different levels of player
and assorted types of games
you’ll come up against strangers
and friends with funny names

but if your just a beginner
an expert or a shark
you’ll love the poker on this site
in whichever seat you park.

2 Likes

As I enter the poker ROOM
Looking for a hot seat to make
my chip stack ZOOM

Searching for friends who
might be HERE
Knowing it’s my chips they
want with their BEER

All prepared to yell at REPLAY
When my chips are taken AWAY

I then remember why I am HERE
To be with friends who are so DEAR

2 Likes

The warriors sit at the table of felt,
like statues carved in cold stone.
Waiting in silence for hands to be dealt,
each person an army alone.

The battles are fought with cards and clay chips,
with brains and with heart and with skill.
Fought for the glory of championships,
for money, or just for the thrill.

Emotions run high as the war rages on,
but eventually comes to an end.
One warrior standing, the rest of them gone,
the victor a crown to defend.

After it’s ended there’s tales to tell,
of hands made and showdowns seen.
Of those who fought and those who fell,
Upon this blood-soaked field of green.

9 Likes

Every hand I get
you seem to be beating
I’m beginning to think
you gotta be cheating

i’m down to my wits end
i’m starting to blush
are you sure 7-2 offsuit
beats a royal flush

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Some say pokers a sin,but i feelvery good when i win!i sat in a hot chair when i came;then got burnt on the river,and “bam”,i;m out of the game!

Oh listen and hear me my little dears
Sit in on my table and watch with fear
You think pokers fun and you have me on the run
The game my friend has just barley begun
Sit back and watch me do my thing
And please don’t cry when you lose that ring
To win at poker you must understand
Its all about playing top quality hands
Replay Free poker is a Different game
Its called progressive poker it should be their trade name
They feed the chip leaders to shorten their games
You can watch bingo players lose without fear
Just refill my stack there you little brats

1 Like

there was an silly old dutch
he loved the poker so much
left wife, dog and cat
slept on a straight without bed
so happy as a re-player can get

1 Like